on being in love

Here's a nice one, I have an urge to spread some joy. This is how I felt the last time I was in love. Yes, it happens to me too, in degrees. As determinedly anti-romance as this blog may seem, let me state for the record that I heart romance. A world without romance, without being in love, would be a cold and grey place.

I have loved being in love. It’s happened a few times and it’s been one of my most favourite states of being. It is such fun getting there, pushed along by romantic settings, moments or actions, sometimes it takes just one loving gesture, sometimes a series. I love it when I catch myself smiling, walking along the street, thinking of when a lover last touched me, or grinned at me. Sometimes just feeling I am loved and or in love with someone makes my whole world seem brighter, more exciting and my life feel more lived.

Sure, falling out of love, the pain of hot tears washing scales from eyes, is not so good. But you keep going. I'd hazard that people don’t really die of broken hearts. It’s a muscle. Am I the only one who remembers those diagrams from 3rd year biology classes? Aortas and stuff? Anyway, I'm meant to be spreading joy. Point being clumsily made is, don’t let the threat of love’s flight put you off letting it into your life. Or giving it out to others – who knows what joy they will getting from being loved by you?

Love your lovers. Even if you have more than one. Even if you have no idea what the future holds, or how long this will last. There’s a reason they are called lovers, not fuckers. Being in love is something to be enjoyed, to revel in, to claim as your right. Being in love cannot be bought and it cannot be sold. It’s organic and it’s beautiful. Being in love should make you smile more.

So, don’t be dictated to by past experiences, your own or those of anyone else, and don’t be ruled by society’s dos and don’ts when it comes to love. You, your lover and the time you share are all that matters. And when you feel like you’re falling in love – don’t be scared, just accept it, it's life and it’s yours. Life is too short to turn down being in love.

Sometimes is hurts but look after yourself, let romantic love come and go of its own accord, and you should be fine. Make it part of your life rather than your reason for living and it will sustain you, make you good. Leave everyone as you found them, if not better. And one day, you may not leave them at all.

Aaaaah. Get me.

AB